Squashed Dreams.

At one point in my life, I wanted to be an attorney. Okay, for most all of my life - from age 7 until about 20 - I wanted to be an attorney. So, what did I do? I got a job an a law office at 18, and my dreams were shot to hell. Was it the long hours the attorney's worked that turned me off? No. Was it the endless amounts of telephone calls, letters, and court appearances? Well, sort of - but No. It was the attorneys, themselves. From the second I was comfortable enough to talk to the attorneys about my goal of becoming a law student, I was discouraged.

Me: So I was thinking about applying to law school next year.
Attorney: OH MY GOD, NO! Do anything but that! Why would you want to do that to yourself?! Become a doctor, a nurse, a stripper. Anything, but an attorney.
Me: *Solemnly stare while dreams are squashed.* Is it really that bad?
Attorney: That bad, and worse.

No lie, that has been the rough basis of every single conversation I have EVER had with an attorney about me going to law school.

While I accept this advice and mostly agree with the assumption that I would rather have an actual life, and family than be an attorney, I can't help but feel a little bitter about their outright discouragement. Sure, they know better than me. They've' been through it, and know what it's like to not be there for your family, or have so much pressure you can't stand it....I get it.

My parents were extremely upset with their audacity, especially when I was younger. They couldn't believe that someone would actually say that. The attorneys weren't telling me that I couldn't make it through school, or that I wasn't smart enough - they were simply trying to "save me the pain of realizing I would hate it after spending $100,000 on school."

Being in the legal field for 5 years has shown me that, no, law school is not for me. Being an attorney is not for me, but I needed to learn that for myself. I know that my attorney friends were just trying to do me a favor, but honestly I didn't totally make the decision until I saw just how much it's NOT my personality to be one.

So I'm over that. Decision is 80% made that I will not go to law school and now we have this:

When or if I'm ready to have children. I am of the opinion that that plan is 150% completely up to my husband and I. ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY PERCENT. But if I mention in passing, "awww what a cute baby, I can't wait to have one of my own." A pack of wolves surround me like I'm a dead rabbit.

"You're not ready!" "Oh my gosh, you're too young!" "You need two years of marriage before you try to have a baby!" "You haven't lived yet!"

It goes on and on and on. I understand that you have children and you've been there, and I GET IT - they throw up, cry at the most inopportune moments, and take up all of your time - but your decision and opinion can not and will not effect my decision.

I'm not ready at this very second, but I'm going to be one day - and what are these people going to say to me then? Congratulations, you've ruined your life? No, they'll act like they never said it was a bad thing, and just ogle over my adorably cute baby and want to hold it, and love it.

What I'm trying to say is - always watch what you say to people. What did or did not work for you, doesn't always work for someone else. It's unfair to pass judgment on people just because you don't think law school, young marriage, or having a child is a good idea.

Who knows, you could be the reason that someone doesn't follow their dreams and their life is forever changed. Solid advice and passing judgment are two very different things, and I hope to take my own advice and be very careful when I make suggestions to my friends. You never know just how deep words can cut.

Spring Fever.

I have spring fever - terribly. I am so over the cold weather, wind, and not being able to go outside for longer than a minute and a half with my dog because my teeth are chattering. I have never enjoyed winter, ever, but for some reason I am dying to put on a tank top and roll the windows down in my car.

Perhaps it's the clothes. With my job, I dress up (like dress up) 4 days a week and my shoes are effing uncomfortable. I have blisters, and bruises and it just hurts to walk sometimes. Summer shoes? A breeze - they don't hurt. Toes are usually exposed, so no cramming into a tiny little point and it's just wonderful. And flip flops, oh flip flops!

I miss my tan, too. Of course you can lay in a tanning bed - but it's just not the same. I love to be outside in a bathing suit by a pool or beach. Light bulbs and an annoyingly loud radio in my ears can not compare.

Not to mention - there is SO much more you can do in the spring/summer. Concerts, outdoor parties, swimming, vacations...the list goes on and on. Once Christmas is over, winter just needs to go the heck on (though it's really just getting started).

No one likes frost bite, or frozen sidewalks, or wearing 18 layers of clothes just to get to work and sweat to death in the heat. Imagine if I actually lived somewhere where it actually got really cold - I can't say that I would be a pleasant individual. Bring it on, summer!

A Request.

So friends, my Mom and I are seriously considering going into the cake business together. We're getting certified, and both of us seem to have a natural talent. I'm pumped.

One problem, I have never - ever, been good at naming things. Take for example, my blog name. No, I don't hate it - I don't think it's dumb, but I think it could be way better. I'm just not good with naming businesses.

So, I'm asking you! Do you have any ideas for a cake business name?? We would do birthday's, anniversary's, and eventually wedding cakes.

Any ideas?!

Mission Accomplished.

So....I FINISHED THE TWILIGHT SERIES!

I read half of the third, and the entire fourth book in 2 days. Only stopping to eat, drink, and other human neccessities that vampires don't have to deal with. Nate laughed at me, but I got so into it, and just wanted to know what happened! Finally, I convinced him that if he would just leave me alone for a while, I'd be done and it would be over.

And now, it's over. And I'm sad. What am I supposed to read now!? Any suggestions?

I highly recommend this series to anyone that has not read it yet. I realize that it's not for everyone - there are vampires, magic and it really is geared toward teenagers/young adults. If you like Harry Potter there is a good chance you will love this (though they aren't remotely the same). This is a love story between a vampire and a very lucky girl.

I was extremely pleased with the storyline, even though a few times I thought the author was crazy as hell for some of the things she was writing - and I can say that her writing did nothing but improve throughout the series. The last book is about 5 steps up on the writing skill level from the first - it's almost like someone else wrote it.

Only complaint, and it's not really even a complaint, but these books get kinda sexual. Hah! And while that's fine with me (as an adult) it's very strange to think of my 11 year old cousin reading a story that involved pillows being ripped to shreds by teeth....I'll leave it at that.

Loved it, loved it. And, I have a pretty large crush on Edward. It's kinda ridiculous, but hopefully the pain in my heart will subside as time goes on! :)

Focus on the Positive.

It was recently pointed out to me that I am a magnet for trouble and/or bad karma. Yes, I was shocked, too. Forced to reflect, I can say that - holy cow I have had some random things happen to me within the last 5 years or so.

Thankfully, only a few of these events were catastrophic or seriously painful (physically or emotionally) but it does seem like it's always something. Just since September, for example: I have been in 2 car accidents, my dog nearly died of yuck, my Grandmama passed away, her granddaughter stole ALL of her money (don't EVEN get me started on that), Nate screwed up his ankle, and now had completely messed up his back at work. Can anyone say insurance claims? Ugh.

Now, I'm sure that these events may be comparatively small to others - and I am quite sure that a lot of people have it way worse.

Point is - even with all of those petty things pointed out - until yesterday, I never even considered that I was "unlucky." And, I still don't. I actually feel super blessed. I'm pretty sure that my faith in God has everything to do with my positive outlook on life. I am of the opinion that "If God brings you to it - He'll bring you through it" and all of these events in hindsight were a breeze compared to how terribly things could have gone, or how difficult it would have been to go-it alone.

Dwelling on the negatives can't possibly feel like living a full life. Sure we all hit some bumps in the road, and sometimes things just flat out go wrong. But realizing (and being thankful) that we have our family, friends, occasional good fortune, and just the privilege of being alive are all plenty to help me look over the minor set-backs.

High School: Then and Now.

A few nights ago, Nate and I were discussing how much the times have changed in public schools in just a short decade. I graduated in 2003, and Nate in 1999. And not to make us sound completely old and outdated, but having a brother who is a senior in high school has made it clear just how much. Some are definitely for the better, while others well – not so much.

High School Then: If you were caught with a cell phone – it was taken from you.

High School Now: Everyone – (even middle schoolers) have them and don’t get them taken away unless they “go off” in class. Thank God for silent mode.

High School Then: It was a big deal for a guy to catch a peek at a girl’s panties at the top of her jeans.

High School Now: We’ve moved on to no panties with a skirt and/or dental floss. (There were few who did this in my day, Nate’s – not so much)

High School Then: My cousin and/or friends smoked cigarettes in the parking lot.

High School Now: All campuses are tobacco free. It’s a HUGE deal to get caught with a cigarette.

High School Then: Students had relationships with teachers (esp. gym coaches) and everyone turned their heads.

High School Now: Students have relationships with teachers - and those teachers go to jail.

High School Then: Teachers who had Facebook and Myspace pages would have been unheard of.

High School Now: Teachers are arrested for things that they put on their FB and MS pages. (Not to mention, I am friends with some of them - and it kinda weirds me out).

Ahh the memories - anyone got anymore to add?

Rainbow Cake.

This is the cake we made tonight in class. Not so bad! When I got home Nate was offended that I had put his name on a "rainbow" cake. I told him to get over it - his name was easy to write!

Class was interesting - there were two women who literally hurried through decorating the cake like it was some sort of race. Like to the point that they were making my Mom nervous. Their's ended up being sloppy and it looked, well, rushed. We just took our sweet little time, used the 2 hours of the class and made some great looking cakes.

And the answer, just in case you were wondering, is yes - I'm for hire :)

A Day of Cakes.

February is a big birthday month for my Dad's side of the family - tomorrow the whole fam is coming to my house to celebrate. So, Mom & I decided to try our hand at making some birthday cakes. Here's what we got!

This is my brother Jake's cake! (He plays the guitar, among many talents) It took a while to do, and it is very detailed - but I am so proud of it. I've got to get better at taking pictures of my cakes though, it looks way better than this in person I must say!

This cake is for my grandparents. It's a "topsy turvy" cake. So much easier to make, and I'm pretty pleased with the outcome.

Making cakes is a tedious project. I have new found respect for the art! My Mom worked hard to get the homemade icing just the right consistency and color, and I did most of the decorating. We made a good team, and I'm looking forward to making more!

25 Things.

My blogger friend Ashley posted a list of 25 things that make her happy on her blog, and tagged me in it to do the same. I love things like this so here's my list:

1. Spending time with my family.

2. Really good food.

3. Laying out in the sun.

4. Seeing a new place/state/country.

5. Hearing an old favorite song on the radio.

6. Puppies - I nearly adopted another last night!

7. The feeling I get at church when the sermon speaks to me.

8. Waking up on Saturday morning and realizing I don't have to get up.

9. Being silly with Nate.

10. Finding out that my friends and family follow my blog.

11. Hearing a baby laugh.

12. Decorating cakes.

13. When I laugh so hard it hurts.

14. Cleaning - and yes, I'm aware that's weird.

15. Reading a good book.

16. Laying on a beach.

17. My Daddy's smile.

18. A good glass of wine.

19. When Bailey cuddles up to me in bed. Nate's not so bad either :)

20. Crab legs.

21. Spending time with my friends.

22. Looking at pictures.

23. Being married to my best friend.

24. Feeling good in a new outfit.

25. A good hug.

Writer's Block.

Okay, so I must first apologize for being absent for the past few days. Previous to now, I really did not know what suffering from "writer's block" felt like - got it loud and clear now. It's like every idea that I have just evolves into nothingness...and honestly it continues. :) I think Edward Cullen may seriously have something to do with that. I have been so wrapped up in the second book of the Twilight series, New Moon, that I really haven't done anything but read at night. Ahh the power of vampire love.

In other news, my Mom and I took our first cake decorating class last night. It was fabulous! We didn't get to decorate anything, we just watched - but, next week we are making an adorable cake! I'll be sure to take pictures of it and post them so you guys can see my progress.

Stay tuned, though! I promise I'll get get over this block and get back to writing more often!